2010: Doesn’t it sound like the future?

Welcome to TEN. What are we going to call 2010? Is there an official version, and who decides? Is this what that Pearl Jam record was about?

We partied in the New Year with an impromptu gathering at casa de Wendronimo, also celebrating my wife’s birthday. Double whammy of awesome. With only a few hours of notice for our low-key shindig, we had a full house of merry makers and a full evening of laughs, hugs and good times. We kept it alive, if laid back, until about 4:00am, which is pretty good for a bunch of early-thirty-something/late-twenties folks, right?

Goodbye, 2009. Few will miss you and your Dexter-like habit of killing celebrities. But what of this new, sci-fi sounding year?

I don’t do New Year’s Resolutions, but I’m all for setting goals and making plans and using a milestone (birth of a new decade) to kick-start some new habits and positive inertia.

Instead of a resolution, I’ve decided on a theme for 2010 – “Who do you want to be?” I think this is an important question; it requires self-analysis and reflection, with a focus on the desired positives as opposed to dwelling on perceived negatives. Instead of looking at myself and saying, “damn, here’s a bunch of things that make me unhappy – I should probably change those”, I’m imagining an ideal version of myself, and seeing how close to that model I can become.

I don’t mean some unreachable, fantasy version of myself, but a real world manifestation of my dreams, goals and personal happiness. Not just for 2010, but for my life in general, down the foreseeable timeline. Some of those things will be easily described, maybe easily achieved. Some will be intensely personal, requiring a lot of “behind the scenes” effort. And there might be some lofty ambitions, lifelong pursuit kinds of stuff – but this is about forward thinking and positivity, so that all works.

(My comic book brain says this is like taking an established character and revamping him for a universe reboot, What If? story or parallel universe line. An ‘Ultimate Adron’, so to speak. If it’s half as good as Bendis’ Ultimate Spider-Man run, things will definitely be looking up.)

I’m still sketching my answer to “Who do you want to be?”, designing my specific archetype, but I can say this much so far:

I want to be happy, healthy and physically active. I want to be a great husband, an excellent friend, a loving pet parent and, eventually, a nurturing father. I want to write everyday, to create a career with my words and vision, to build worlds that people love to get lost in. I want to be a leader in media (of many kinds), to generate quality, to effect change and progress. I want to be an active, performing musician – to play and sing and keep my songs alive. I want to always advance my skills, to never stop learning, to never be complacent – to always grow, evolve and innovate. I want to be strong, to take charge, to not back down from adversity – professionally or personally. I want to de-clutter my life, free it from pointless things that distract or slow me down, to streamline to the things that are important, that are enriching. I want to be a whirlwind of ideas, projects and good works – to always surprise, to capitalize on my poly-talent nature. I want my work ethic to be professional and fruitful, without interfering with the quality of my personal and emotional life. I want to look back without resentment for opportunities missed and roads not taken. I want to live a vivacious present, with eyes on the possibilities of the future. I want to be the man who achieved or failed, but always tried – never squandering my blessings. I want to do right by the ones I love, to never lose sight of their needs and their commitment to me. And I want to always be mindful and grateful, to know how fortunate I am and to give back however I can.

And there’s so much more than that. But that’s my start, that’s my beginning for 2010.

Now then – who do YOU want to be?

Yes, I am a Glee(K)

This is the first real post for the new website. Excited about getting this up and live finally. Just migrated a few years worth of (sporadic) posts from Blogger and MySpace, now to get this thing up to speed with some current content!

I’m going to keep things brief for now (has Twitter affected me that much?), so here’s some general stuff:

I’m addicted to Glee. Seriously, love this show, love the music. The show is a little rough around the edges, but it all really makes me happy. I listen to songs from the soundtrack on YouTube and GrooveShark constantly. Anxious to buy the album.

Geeking on Big Bang Theory. Was recently introduced to this show via Amy & Cory on DVD. Tore through Seasons 1&2 in no time. It’s Wen and I’s just-before-bed show. It’s smart, super funny and totally dorky. Sooooo my thing.

Struggling through The Lost Symbol. I’m a big fan of Angels & Demons. I love the ideas in DaVinci Code, even though the story isn’t that great. I just got started on Dan Brown’s The Lost Symbol. I’m about 100 pages in, and it feels like I’ve been standing in one room for 3 hours while somebody blathers on with a bunch of exposition. So far, I don’t give a damn about any of it. Hope it picks up soon.

I ran into Vedera at Bread Co. They’re a really good rock act out of Kansas City, with one helluva vocalist in Kristen May. Been a fan of their first record, Weight of an Empty room, for a few years. They were in town for a benefit show at the Hard Rock Cafe (which I was unable to attend) but they happened to walk into our St. Louis Bread Co. during a Comic Creator Cabal meeting. Talked with guitarist Brian Little for a bit. Nice folks, wish I could’ve caught the show. Their new record is on iTunes now. Give ‘em a listen here: MySpace.com/Vedera

It’s been some time since I’ve written here. As you may or may not know, I lost my mother at the end of October. It was very unexpected, and the single most difficult and damaging experience of my life. You expect a trauma like that to affect you, but I think ‘how’ is always the big surprise. My family and I are healing, and I appreciate all the help we received during this trying time – particularly from The Armada who, as always, stood by me and propped me up when the weight of it all threatened to overwhelm. I love you all. And no words can describe the unimaginable support provided by my wife and best friend, Wendy. She understands what I’m going through all too well, and it has been her unenviable task of picking up my pieces and gluing them back together when I am struck by the need to fall apart. I hope you all can be so fortunate to have somebody in your life with the capacity to love and give that she possesses.

As for my mom – I love her and miss her, always. Sometimes the ache of it all sets in without warning, waves of sadness and surreality crashing against my weary mind. If you discover me to be a bit odd now and then, please excuse – the carrier pigeons that pass for my neural impulses are slow to deliver to all the dusty corners of my brain. When they finally arrive, I get to experience it all again anew, and apparently each uncharted faction of the mind requires its own slightly personalized method of dealing.

However, this is not a blog about all of that.

I’d like this to be the beginning of a weekly entry – I’m not so thick as to think I’ll always been consistent, but I imagine it’s a worthy goal – especially because I wish no structure on it at all. Just a random collection of my thoughts on the things I encounter day to day. So, that said…

I WATCHED “WAITRESS” TONIGHT. It’s a little film about little people with complex, tangled relationships and one woman’s effort to escape a dead end life. It features Keri Russell (remember “Felicity”?) in an impressive, nuanced performance, and Nathan Fillian (Captain Mal in our beloved “Firefly”) as her awkward, sweet OBGYN and extra-marital love interest. Also contains a splendid turn from Andy Griffith. Sadly, the quirky, talented writer/director (and supporting cast member) Adrienne Shelly never got to see her film debut – she fell victim to an absolutely irrational act of violence, murdered by a construction worker in the building where she kept her office. “Waitress” is a testament to her filmmaking vision, a unique understanding of personal drama, friendship and the gravity of our decisions. It’s funny, sad and insightful, and you should go rent it.

I READ “THE BLADE ITSELF” BY JOE ABERCROMBIE. This is a hard book to describe succinctly, because it doesn’t have an obvious plot. Instead, it follows three very different characters as the threads of their lives are woven together against the backdrop of vivid and brutal fantasy world. Abercrombie’s startlingly good debut novel is packed in turns with exceptional characterizations and visceral, engaging action scenes. He finds a voice quite apart from most fantasy fair, in turns frank and funny and vulgar. Inspector Glokta and Logen Nine-Fingers are two of the most fascinating fantasy characters I’ve encountered in years, and I most eagerly await the sequel (set to land on American shores in February, I think). Get thee to a bookstore.

I MET WRITER/DIRECTOR JAMES GUNN. First, outside of the radio station, where I quickly introduced myself (with the obligatory “I’m a big fan” AND “we’re friends on MySpace”). Later, Cory, Big T and I spoke with him after a Q&A session at the St. Louis Movie Festival. Both times he was very gracious and easy to speak with. And he was hella funny during the Q&A – the man is a silly bitch. Not surprising from the fellow who wrote/directed “Slither” (starring the aforementioned Nathan Fillian as ‘Bill Pardy’).

I SAW “THE MIST” IN THE THEATER. 95% awesome, but that last 5% was such a kick in the privates that it made me hate the film. The director and I will have words some day, oh yes. Skip the last 3 minutes and it’s a pretty good flick.

ALSO SAW “BEOWULF” AT THE CINE, IN 3D. I felt bad that I missed Neil Gaiman’s “Stardust” in theaters, so I hastened to “Beowulf”. It’s impressively animated, but at times poorly directed or edited – it loses its flow frequently, with long, boring moments creating an awkward canter between some really thrilling action sequences. The dragon battle near the end is particularly badass. Angelina Jolie’s digital presence in the film is distracting, and the fact that her computer-rendered face looks absolutely identical to the real life version and yet is still sort of disturbing only suggests that she borders on inhuman. If you love CGI or sword-n-sorcery tales, give it a go. But it can wait for dvd – the 3d is neat, but I don’t think it will lose much without it.

THE UNRATED, UNCUT OF “TALLEDEGA NIGHTS” SUCKS. Seriously, get the theatrical version – the director’s cut ruins the comedic timing of the entire movie. They say 13 minutes were put back in, but it feels like an extra 2 hours. “The Ballad of Ricky Bobby” works as a concise piece of pop silliness, but fails when the editor becomes indulgent. And you’ll hear the phrase ‘Shake and Bake’ way more than is really tolerable.

THE FIRST EPISODE OF THE “TERMINATOR” TV SERIES ROCKS. I was fortunate enough to land a screener of the upcoming “Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles” pilot from Fox. I didn’t have high hopes for this, but Summer Glau (River on “Firefly”) co-stars as a new take on the protective Terminator, and that was enough to get me in the door. The show follows roughly after T2, with some time lapse. And it rocked – totally captured the feel of T2’s ominous paranoia and machine-blunt action. T, Cory and I re-entered this world with severe doubts and left genuinely jazzed up. Debuts in January, and I think a fair amount of it was finished before the writer’s strike, so yay for non-rerun TV!

I JOINED A COMIC BOOK CREATOR CLUB. My new dorky haunt, Twilight Comics in Shiloh (in the Green Mount shopping plaza near Target) is hosting a bi-weekly gathering of writers, artists and assorted other creative types interested in making comics. Despite the crappy weather, the first meeting was well attended and tons of fun. It was compelling to converse with a handful of other guys entrenched in the craft of sequential art storytelling. The group was heavy on writers in this first go ‘round, but there was an artist there whose portfolio and work ethic were extremely impressive. The second meeting is this coming Thursday. We’ve been charged with creating something new for each week, pages of script or art, at least a little something creative to share with the group. I’ve not had a very productive couple of weeks, but I’m hoping to complete a six page rough draft of a script for one of my comic properties.

A HANDFUL OF OTHER THINGS:

I’m reading “Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Joss Whedon’s Season 8”, DC’s “Booster Gold” and My Chemical Romance frontman Gerard Way’s “Umbrella Academy” comics. Good stuff all around. After 7 years, though, I’m losing interesting Brian Michael Bendis’ “Powers”. I think I’m only still getting it out of habit.

I received the “His Dark Materials” trilogy as an early Christmas present, which I’m excited about. Also got the first volume of “Preacher”, which I read on the job at Fantasy Shop years ago. It was a fun re-read – a little rough around the edges, but sets up the inspired insanity of the rest of the series.

I’m 3/5 of the way through “The Spiderwick Chronicles”. It’s pretty decent kid’s fare, really one book split into a 5 volume serial – presumably to make more money by releasing them as $10 mini-hardcovers. The reading leans a bit thin as it often relies on the accompanying illustrations to describe the people, creatures and locales. My favorite element so far is, of the three sibling protagonists, one is singled out as our main touch point, while his twin takes a backseat. I think that’s a fairly unique way to portray twins in fiction.

My friend Roi’s band, The Material, made it all the way to second place in a big MTV2 contest. They performed at the competition finale in Times Square. It’s a big deal for these guys, a real break that is creating some exciting opportunities. Roi’s been pursuing music as a career for the better part of 15 years, so I’m really excited for him. (Some of you may remember him as the guitarist from Cory’s old band, Cope.) The Material has a nice hard melodic rock sound with a female vocalist. Strangely, I’d been following the band for almost a year on MySpace before Roi moved west and eventually joined up with them. Find them and show them some love.

Jimmy Eat World’s new record is pretty awesome, especially the first single “Big Casino”.

Another band to check out is In This Moment – met them the other day. Nice folks, solid performers, and the lead guitarist is sorta like a dreadlocked, metal version of Seth Rogen.

It’s now 12:30 and I have physical therapy in the morning. Yay for cracking and stretching and putting my body back into some semblance of alignment.

All my love,
adron

Another fantastic show from Carbon Leaf. Last Friday, a small contingent of Armadians attended the CL headlining show at the Blueberry Hill Duck Room. It was the band’s first sold-out St. Louis show, which they were obviously excited about. Somebody offered Doug a hundred bucks for his ticket (which he turned down). The concert was incredible, an absolutely revelatory performance. Carbon Leaf is my favorite band. Wen and I have seen them live four times now. This show was my favorite so far. Interesting show highlight: they began their encore by going completely unplugged. No mics, no amps, just the band (sans drums) projecting “Learn to Fly” to a packed room struggling to remain silent. Other highlights – friggin’ everything.

Dork out moment: Doug, Wen and I walked up to CL guitarist Terry Clark after the show to shake hands (and hugs from Wen). Before even exchanging a greeting, he tells us that the bands sound tech had spotted Doug’s shirt (which says “Joss Whedon is my Master Now”) and excitedly called the bands attention to it through their ear-monitors. Turns out the band just watched all seven seasons of Buffy the Vampire Slayer on DVD via their laptop while on tour. They were completely stoked to see a Whedon fan in the crowd. We all dorked out for a minute, and insisted that they spend some quality time with “Firefly” next (appropriately, I was wearing my “Browncoat” shirt from “Serenity”). It’s good to know that our favorite band is our kind of people.

Hot Blog-on-Blog Action: awhile back I commented on a short story collection, “Little Gods” by Tim Pratt, that I had really enjoyed. I sent the author an email telling him how much I liked the book, and which stories I found most affecting. He was kind enough to write back about a week later. He also apparently checked out my blog (the link is on my email signature), and wrote about my comments on his own online journal (he linked off to me, too). Pretty cool. This evening, we made a Borders run and I picked up Pratt’s novel “The Strange Adventures of Ranger Girl”, to be perused during our upcoming trip to New York to visit Mary and Gene.

I also cashed in all of my Christmas gift certificates and, with a 30% coupon, picked up Absolute Sandman volume one for just over fourteen bucks (it’s regularly priced at $99). I discovered Sandman with issue #50 in early high school and have been a Neil Gaiman fan every since. This Absolute edition collects the first four story arcs of Sandman in an oversized hardcover with a gorgeous slipcase. The pages have been recolored, and it includes a slew of “special features”. Now, if the absolute editions just come out every Christmas, maybe I’ll be able to use this tactic again…

Last weekend I attended a book signing in my hometown by one of my high school teachers for her recently published book of poetry, “Leaving the Limberlost”.

I stupidly wrote the quite long journal entry about the visit in my web browser, then MySpace crashed before I could save it. I can never bring myself to rewrite a lost blog like that, so here’s a summary: 1) it was nice to see my teacher again, and talk shop about writing; 2) chatted up some other old instructors who didn’t recognize me at first with the long haired that characterized me in school; 3) had nice chats with my (long-time-no-see) high school friends Jessi and Ben. Jessi runs the coffee shop that hosted the signing which is really cute. Ben and his adorable wife actually live pretty close to Wen and I. He’s a dentist now; 4) a little hometown nostalgia got me stalking through the MySpace High School listing to find profiles of my old classmates. There’s quite a few of the folk in my class and the ones around it on the ‘Space. Mostly, I was struck by how old most of them looked (though I should note that Jessi and Ben both looked almost exactly as I remembered them). In particular, any classmates who had children looked in the neighborhood of 40ish, instead of our actual late twenties / very early thirties.

Scary stuff. Made me examine myself in the mirror for signs of age. Over the last year or so, I’ve been told several times that people think I’m a guy in his mid-thirties who looks like he’s in his late twenties. I’m not really sure what to make of that…

As previously mentioned, Wendy and I are flying out to NYC later this week. We’re working on all the preparations now. It’s been a very long time since we had any kind of vacation, so we’re pretty excited. I’m hoping Gene and I will be able to attend the New York Comic Con for a day (it happens to be going on the weekend we’re there) but, in general, we’re just stoked to spend some time with the McKellys.

Currently:
/// watching Invasion (complete series on dvd). Three episodes from the end. It’s pretty good.
/// reading Peter and the Starthieves (sequel to Peter and the Starcatchers).
/// watching Batman: The Animated Series season #1 while I work out.

Here’s another round of random bloggings:

. Pro Evo – I got this book today in the mail called ProEvo: Pro Evolution – Guideline for an Age of Joy. I’ve never heard of it, didn’t order, don’t know where it came from, other than it was plastic wrapped with an insert that mentioned the mysterious “Foundation”.

Googling the book, and it’s author, Tomotom Stiflung, only led me to a string of other blogs of people who had received the book under similar circumstances. It can be found on Amazon (see the link above) for a penny (!) and no real information. The actual website for the book is extremely vague – and in German, I think. I translated it in BabelFish, but it was not informative in any way.

On brief inspection, the book seems to be a weird mess of common sense ideas laced with wild assumptions and stretched logic, pushing a hive-mind agenda, insisting that no one is a true individual. For instance, from pages 78-79:

Man in not an independent being with his “own” strength and his “own” thoughts and actions. Whatever he may think or do consciously or unconsciously: all is behavior that occurs automatically within the energy-organism of the universe…

Reading the back cover of the book brings on a true WTF moment – all seven supportive blurbs are credited to people identified only by their initials, with equally vague descriptors. Example: Prof. Dr. L. K., world famous scientist, and Dr. B. M. S., university professor. The most ridiculous attribution is to “A large country’s institution for press, books, films, television and radio”! Whoa.

. Carbon Leaf Concert – thanks to the handful of folks who joined me out at the Carbon Leaf show back on the 6th. The concert was fantastic, and I think all who came with me to Mississippi Nights walked away with a solid appreciation for this group. They currently share the position of “Adron’s Favorite Band” with Breaking Benjamin, albeit in a completely different musical genre.

. B-Day – Thanks also to everyone who sent me birthday wishes and to whom I haven’t responded to yet. I’m wayyyyyyyyyyy behind in all my communications, so please bear with me. My cellphone currently has 12 messages I haven’t listened to yet (I hate talking on the phone and checking voicemails), and my inbox is full of un-replied-to messages. I usually try to bury my birthday and keep it a very quiet thing, but this year it got turned into a week long event. If I seem like I’m hiding from the world right now, it’s because I was so social for a couple of weeks that I kind of burnt out. I have to hermit out once in awhile just to retain my sanity.

. NEW GIG – It’s literally been a year since the last time I played a show, so it’s fitting that my first gig in a long while would be the same show I played last year. Come check out the 3rd Annual MS Benefit at Laurie’s Place in Edwardsville, IL, on November 4th. I’ll post more details for the show when I have ‘em. It’s for a great cause and it’s a good time. If you’re reading this and thinking “what? Adron’s a musician?” then you really should come to the show.

. Fragile Things – Just started reading Neil Gaiman’s new short story collection, Fragile Things. It is, as usual, utterly brilliant most of the time, haunting, compelling and thoroughly enjoyable. If you’ve not read Gaiman, then you’re missing one of the great voices in modern literature.

. Down in the Valley – Watched Down in the Valley, starring Edward Norton, Evan Rachel Wood and David Morse, on DVD the other morning. Despite all of the critical praise, I didn’t find much in this film. I think Norton could have performed this role in his sleep. It’s a slow flick and I had to fight to retain interest. The “twist” is just a very surprising moment, and it did catch me off guard, but I felt like it meandered afterward into a vaguely unsatisfactory ending. I gained no big insights from the work. Just a curiousity about Ed Norton’s inconsistant facial hair. Good music choices, though, including the quiet beauty of Mazzy Star.

You may be asking, “Who?” To be honest, I don’t really know either. But I do know they’re hip with the indie kids. I think I’ve seen their shirts at Hot Topic. They’re in town tonight to do a show with Fall Out Boy – the band developing a reputation (with anyone over 18 or that have been to more than 3 concerts ever) as the group that manages to sell out every show whilst being notoriously poor live performers.

The Heights guys were nice enough, in a detached, personality-less kinda way. I’ve seen photos of them before, and they lived up exactly to my expectations. One of their guitar players looks, well, doofy. There’s no better word for it. And he was exactly that. Every time he opened his mouth, the other two guys gave him the “for God’s sake, shut up already” look, well practiced and obviously habitual.

They played two songs: “Ohio is for Lovers” and whatever their current single is. Witness the melodrama of “Ohio…”

And I can’t make it on my own.
(And I can’t make it on my own.)
Because my heart is in Ohio.
So cut my wrists and black my eyes.
(Cut my wrists and black my eyes)
So I can fall asleep tonight, or die.
Because you kill me.
You know you do, you kill me well.
You like it too, and I can tell.
You never stop until my final breath is gone.

The guitar players were actually pretty good, but the vocalist is of a type increasing common in the emo/alternative world. These “singers” can barely project at all. Their diminuative vocals absolutely require a microphone and the sound system pushed to full volume, just to be heard above, oh, say, the roar of a ceiling fan. They are lost on acoustic performance, at least if you’re in the studio and aren’t wearing headphones like the jock. Maybe he pushes it a little harder live, I don’t have basis for comparison here, but it was totally weak.

Among the other artists I’ve encountered like this: Kill Hannah (talented band, but the vocalist has a pale imitation of Garbage’s Shirley Manson for a voice), and aging-industrial wannabes Gravity Kills (who delivered the most mistake filled, flat studio performance I’ve seen outside of the band Thursday).

/// Listening to “Year of the Spider” by Cold